A Martyr No More

Our twelve year old son had a meeting after church and he needed a ride home. The meeting went five minutes late. His dad went to pick him up and had to wait for him. He was in a bad mood so he berated our son on the drive home. When they got home, he told our son he had to sit in the hot car for 20 minutes as a punishment for being “late”. He set the timer.

I intervened and said our son wasn’t going to do that. I was so scared, but I didn’t let our son sit in the hot car. His dad fumed and left the house for hours. I tried talking with him. He refused to acknowledge my position. We never resolved it, we just stopped talking about it.

I brought this up years after the incident, in an attempt to resolve it. I shared how it impacted me and the kids. He said that I betrayed him because I didn’t support his punishment. I told him that making a child sit in a hot car is child abuse. I said I wouldn’t change what I did. In fact, I would do it again. I won’t stand for child abuse.

He said nothing. We changed the subject.