This is some of my self-talk and affirmations as I tried staying in the marriage: I’ve acted with courage for all of these years. Even when I’ve been scared, I’ve been kind. I’ve gained skills for handling conflict. I’ve learned that people are a mix of wonderful and awful. The awful parts aren’t their identity.
I have been courageous. I am courageous. I took a leap of faith to get married and I’ve stuck with it. I trust myself. I have done a good job. I have been kind. Unfailingly kind. At times I’ve been confused, but I’ve not let confusion make me unkind or disbelieve in the innate goodness of others.
I am kind. I am courageous. I trust myself. I believe in myself. I believe in others. When unexpected and confusing situations arise, I trust my instincts and my inner compass. I make mistakes, but I recover from them. There is always hope.
All my feelings are okay. Feelings of joy and happiness as well as annoyance, fear, indignation, frustration, confusion. They are all information. Information I know how to act with as I listen.
“Those who say it costs nothing to be kind haven’t met a narcissist.”
A Martyr No More 
Leave a comment